Missing my dulce

my baby..our bunso!

dulce, my beloved pet..she is a dog and was given as a gift from a friend of my mama, we had her on February 22, 1999..since then on i fell inlove with her and so my whole family. i took care of her and had her slept beside me in bed on her crib..she was very small then as she was a mixed bred (chihuahua and i do not know).

She was a darling to everyone as she acts like a human being, a member of our family deprived only of the human ability to speak. But nevertheless she can express her thoughts, her feelings. she sheds tear when she is scolded, she hides in her solitary confinement when she is refused of her desires.

What amazes me most is the fact that she knew when my parents are leaving for Alabel. She runs to the door of our car and jumps inside as soon as the door is being open. She exudes excitement and happiness knowing that it is time to visit my grandparents, baldo (a big dog of nanay) and the fruit trees my father has cultivated.

She knew the way to “ubos” and can play along with the “askals” thereat without losing her regal bearing. She follows mama and papa as if like a toddler enjoying the vast fields surrounding her. My late lolo and lola adores her too..she sits in the terrace along with the whole family as we exchange talks on weekends. My lola often described her as having a “mayapad nga likod.”

A spoiled brat though as she knows everyone adored her and she considers herself a princess and in fact she is treated like one. She seem to have developed the ability if emphatizing with our feelings. A guardian in our house and at the same time our baby.

When she got pregnant the first time, it was a traumatic experience for her. Just one sunday morning i think, we never realized she was due to give birth. Seeing her in pain was excruciatingly painful for us as well. She was having a hard time giving birth and that we have to pull-out the pup inside of her. Sadly, through the laborious effort the pup was already dead.

However, she did not give up. She got pregnant the second time. And this time, we had her confined in a vet-clinic. She underwent CS and had 4 pups then. But only one survived up to this moment, he is Chimee.

Early this year, almost as the same time when my lola got sick she also had this bulging painful thing on her face. Slowly, she also lost her sight. We tried to check on what is wrong with her. Due to old age, the vet said her health is slowly deteriorating.

Me and papa tried to alleviate her pain by giving her medication every day and night. Months have passed and the wounds never healed. My attempt to cure her was futile. It has worsen. My daily routine includes our bonding time as i put on her medication. Had she not been very strong and a fighter, i know she could have gave up a long time ago. It was painful seeing her effort just to feed herself with her favorite yummy bones from spazzio, jollibee, kfc and ziesta. I know she misses her trips in the farm and joyride on weekends with mama and papa.

I know deep within she was holding on too for us. I knew how much she loved us as we have loved her. The night before she died i whispered to her i love her and that she get well for us. I knew then her time is near as she already refused to eat and could not even get up and carry herself to the comfort room. But i refused to give up and started cleaning her wound and took care of her medications.

Sadly, on October 17, 2008 at past 10 aM, Dulce left us. I even fed her before I left for work trying to assure myself that i will still see her later that night and which i have been wrong. She has succumbed to illness. I know she is happy wherever she is now. After all, she can now rest from the pain she has gone through for months. I know she is looking after us.

I just miss my usual routine. I miss seeing her in her bed. i miss hearing her knock on my door asking that she be allowed to sleep inside my room. i miss seeing her big butt as it sways while she walk so majestically. i miss her unique way of looking at me with her big eyes as if telling me everythings gonna be okay. i miss being able to tell her how i feel. i know she understands my innermost feelings and i know her love for us was truly unconditional. I find it hard to believe that she is gone. My baby is gone, I miss her antics and her unbelievable way of showing how much she loves us..i miss u dulce..i really miss u so much!